Barbecue and beer (not at the same time)

You've never been to the Mallard Creek Presbyterian Church barbecue? This is the 83rd year, so it's not like you haven't had time.

You've never joined that line of cars creeping up Mallard Creek Road, walked through that line of politicians, balanced your plate on the trestle tables while you perch on a wiggly metal folding chair?

You've never contemplated what the white bread is for, and mixed your pork with a little apple sauce and slaw just to see what that's like, and debated their unique formula for Brunswick stew?

You've never waved at people you haven't seen all year -- or desperately searched your brain to identify the person who just waved so enthusiastically at you?

You've never sat with your plate on a perfect, sunny fall day and admired that tin can of flowers on the table and tried several squirts of sauce to decide how you really like it?

You've never stopped by the back of the building where the Brunswick stew pots are, to watch those hard-working women stir?

Well, for heaven't sake -- don't start this year. It's a presidential election year and it's going to be crowded enough. And . . . I want to make sure I get my plate before you get there.

Oh, if you insist: Here are the details, prices, directions and hours. If you must. And that picture at the top? I have no idea when I shot it. Because that's really what I love best about Mallard Creek Thursday: Every year is exactly like the year before. And the year before. For 83 times.

--
On to beer: Here we go, from old Charlotte traditions to new ones. If you haven't started exploring Charlotte's new craft-beer movement, you're missing out on a lot of fun and some darn good beer.

We're up to 9 local breweries now. Nine? Seriously?

Tonight from 7 to 10 p.m., you can explore at least six of them and vote for your favorite at the Battle of the Brews at  All-American Pub, 200 E. Bland St. Tickets are $15 at the door (they were $10 in advance, but I didn't get the information about it in time). It raises money for the 704 Project, a group that gathers money and gives grants to local projects.

--
And one more barbecue: If you can't make it up to Mallard Creek today, you have another chance at a church barbecue on Friday. The First Christian Church, 1200 East Blvd. at Dilworth Road, will hold its men's fellowship barbecue, with pork shoulders, sauce and coleslaw all made by the church. Plates or pounds are $8, or you can buy a whole cooked shoulder (boned or bone-in) for $30. Stop by between 11 a.m. and sundown on Friday or Saturday.